I believe this is what an anxiety attack is!

I Absolutely ADORE Nic.. but I just got several emails letting me know:
Jet has been forced to cancel two upcoming shows as lead singer Nic Cester has acute laryngitis. Doctors have ordered Cester to rest for four to five days.
The cancelled dates - Philadelphia tomorrow, September 29th, as well as Toronto on Sunday, October 1st - will be rescheduled sometime in November. The rest of the band will still travel to Toronto for scheduled press and promotional activity. Jet's tour will resume Tuesday, October 3rd in Los Angeles, where the band is scheduled to perform on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno.
Hmph. I am real nervous that I will drive down to LA and poor Nic will not be in any better shape.. and I will be a total loser in LA with nothing to do.. AND WAIT.. Leno?? why don't they tell people this earlier.. I tried to get tickets.. because I could totally drive down there a day early.. but they are SOLD OUT and I am on the waiting list.. whatever!!!!

Thoughts?

1st attempt at paper mache' tail.. went a little overboard and mummified Mocha

I was brainstorming and thought I could make Mocha a paper mache' tail.. So, he wont have a phantom itch on a tail that doesn't exhist.. I don't want the other dogs to lsugh at him and make him feel inadequate.. Its a dog eat dog world out there!

Advanced directive

I originally stated to my friends and family, that if I was ever in need of medical care, and the ambulance and or firemen was a hot piece -o- ass, I was to be allowed to die clothed. I do not want to be faced with the daunting task of dealing with hot dudes who have not earned the right to see my deal. I would like to ammend this directive to state that if ANY emergency personnel is called due to a heart attack, stroke.. or any such emergency that would require that my clothes be cut off partially, or in their entirety, I am instructing you to just let me die. I want no one to see me naked ever. never. I am shy girl. Leave me be.. tee hee

It is the cross I bear!

It all started a week or so ago, when I got a hot pair of JLO looking earrings .. They were having a jewelry sale at work.. and I wanted to take my hotness rating up a few notches.... so I purchased some flashy silver hoops. I wore them today to work and all hell broke loose!! That crazy beyotch, pictured above, has always had the hots for me. I mean she is a "preachers wife".. but those are the kinkiest HO'S out there. I happened to be taking my break next to her.. and along with 2 of her friends..she JUMPED ME. They threw me to the ground and started yanking off my drawers! I was mortified! My pants tore and split clean up my kootch area.. Thankfully the burntnes from the last incident cleared up..But how dare they.. I mean I get paid for such touchy feely type shit.. Hell, at least dinner and a movie?

Earlier in the day, Bren got particularly irritated with me after I sneezed pretty loud and she LOST IT! She ran over to my desk, with packing tape in hand.. and began to TAPE UP MY HEAD! I instictually placed my hands over my face to protect my money maker.. She went around and around and around.. I was a MUMMY. The worst part about it is I could hear chuckles from EVEYONE in my office.. and I swear I think a few flashes went off!!

jetisode #1

News on the Mocha front

Mocha has been biting his tail like crazy.. I, being the protective mother that I am, immediately set up an appointment with his doctor. I wanted to prevent any possible infection and have the doctor give him a once over. I asked Mocha's Daddy to take him.. and as usual 1/2 of what was discussed at the visit was lost. I ended up having to call the doctor and find out what happened. Apparently, when he took a spill down the stairs, he not only sprained his shoulder, he also did MAJOR nerve damage to his tail.. As soon as I heard this, I thought back to his little weird body and had noticed that it was hanging kinda low. When I got home, the little tail was just swinging in the wind. My poor little moch-ito! The prognosis ain't good, dear reader.. AMPUTATION is on the horizon. ugh

I am a WINNER!

Why leave my fate in the hands of some dumb contest? Really, now.. I am so above that..

With that said, I bought a ticket to the Vegas show.. I is going to party Vegas style and show Nic how it is done.

One concern, though. It mentions wearing club wear.. What the F is that?

OCD

Yup. I am self diagnosing here. But I am pretty sure I have this affliction. It is really sad that I can see my spiraling behavior and do NOTHING about it. As you probably already guessed, the disease has surfaced with the news of the new album, SHINE ON, from Jet. You know!!!! Jet the uber sexy boys from Australia.
I watched with great anticipation, as news trickled out about the new album. A few lines from the first single.. then a few press photos.. and finally the dates of the mini tour.. I was saddened to see that they weren't announcing any NO CAL shows.. but decided to plan a road trip to see them in Anaheim. Well, needless to say.. it snowballed. I heard they were going to be on Jimmy Kimmel on the Friday after the Wednesday Anaheim show, so I got tickets to that.. and then I figured I couldn't be in SO CAL on Thursday and not attend the LA show.. so, here is the plan..

Wed.. Jet..
Thur...Jet
Friday .. Jet

Now, if things go according to plan, I will win the party Vegas style .. and get to go to Vegas on Saturday and catch them there.. keep your fingers crossed.

Peace out.

P.S. did you know if you go to www.jettheband.com their new single is on a continuous loop? PINCH me!

Found this lil gem!

I win,again!

Jared and I were fighting again..
I called him up and asked him to play the new Jet song... He immediately said it sucked.. well, I went off on him.. How Dare he?? I finally got him to agree to play the song.. Turns out he didn't.. SO, I expressed my anger in an email.. and here is our email interaction..

Me 2 Jared:

I had total mad respect for you.. Until yesterday, that is.
To each his own.. and all that.. So, I can forgive you for not liking Jet. (although I think you are totally lame for it) But to tell me you will play their new single next..( which forces me to listen to your horrible show).. and then NO JET!?!?!?!?!?!??! No love for Jared ANYMORE!BOO Jared ..SHINE ON JET!


Jared 2 Me:

BITTER. you needs some lovin...or booze. Settle it down a bit missy. I think the new song sucks. I like the band. Have you even heard it?

Me 2 Jared:

Dude.. Have you heard the song? It IS rock and roll .. How can you not like that? Maybe in your MADDOG haze you were listening to some god awful song by Joan JETT or Jefferson Airplane or something.. This can totally be forgiven.. I have to take into account your age and all.. Here is a link to the video.. Take a peak.. IT ROCKS!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a024OmDVBB0&eurl=

By the way, did I mention that ..
Jet makes me wet!!! (and you did too before you were such a dickus)

Jared 2 Me

Alright!!!!!!!!!! YOU WIN! They DO rock. I have been taking alot of meds lately. And I am not a dickus. When ladies dont hear what they want, why do you start name calling? LOVE YOU!

Me 2 Jared:


Peace out, my brotha... I is wet for you again!

My baby... with her nanny.. Isn't she growing like a weed?

I is moonlighting

On Saturday, I was lucky enough to babysit the "baby".. you can't really call Jill a baby anymore.. She is almost 10 months old !! It seems like just yesterday she was yanked out of my sister's cooter... (ugh) Anyways, it seemed like we always hit a wall.... she would be fine and then LOSE it.. I think I finally figured out what is happening. We both eat dinner.. watch some tele.. read a book or two.. and then settle down for a bottle with Shan-o's titty milk (YUM) .. LIGHTBULB! This is usually when she freaks out.. The lil monkey is reminded of mom.. and suddenly realizes she ain't there.. Hmph. It only takes the mooster a few hits on the head to get it.. A-HA! The titty milk will be banned from all future sittings!!!!
Gosh I am good...

But damn it I need a raise.. !!

Team Fire Crotch

I have realized, yet again.. that I am a supreme TARD.
The other day, the girls went over to Sandy's CHINA TASTE to get some grub for lunch. WHen we were exiting the dive, 4 ultra hot fireman were sitting aroung an outside table.. I turned to my friend and said, Bren.. we got a dilemma.. I have a fire in my crotch and I do believe the only thing that will put it out would be one of those FINE fireman .. with one of their HOSES.. (I know.. they have probably heard it a million times, but it was new to me!!!)I swear I was a bustin a gut ALL damn day.. The girls swore that my meds were out of whack or something..

Flashback

Mi uno amore, Rick (right)

OK.. NOT the Rick I remembered.. He kinda looks like Felix.. (sigh)
Last night I was being a tard and watching MADE on MTV .. (Yes, I am 33.. but sometimes I like to pretend I am sexy and 17!!! GOSH!) Anyways, this poor girl was SOOOO shy and she wanted to be like Miss Teen Arkansas or something.. and she couldn't even to talk to boys.. tee hee.. They made her too nervous.. I got like this freaky flashback.. SHE WAS ME.. !!! I can hardly believe it.. Cuz now you can't shut me up.. So, maybe a lot of things have changed.. Like I don't like Stevie V anymore..I don't shop at Contempo anymore.. And I am not hot for Rick.. (sniff sniff) My unrequited love was unrequited for a reason, I guess.. Jeez he does still look rock 'n' roll.. (A little more roll, though).. Kick ass bod though! Mad props to rick! xoxo