Me ma

impromptu photo shoot prior to the surgery.
Ma was less then pleased

YUP, I have been MIA for awhile. Its primarily because me ma needed me. I was being the dutiful daughter and tending to her. I ain't like those normal white chicks that stick their ma in a home. We Irish keep them around forever... She is all set for the mylar balloon.. (inside joke) Anyways, me ma FINALLY had eye surgery. She has been living in a cataract haze for several years now. Love the woman to death.. but today on the ride home from getting her patch off, she had to comment on everything. Like a fricken toddler. She read every sign and commented on every color .. GREEN.. WOW.. IS THAT SNOW ON THE MOUNTAINS??? LOOK AT THAT! WOW! YELLOW! COOL!

Give me a break.. I haven't had enough coffee today....
and besides it JUST occurred to me that this BLIND ass woman has been driving during her haze.. why is she excited about seeing green? Has she not seen a stop light.. GOD ALMIGHTY!

p.s. ma is a-ok

poor Jiji.

The other day, my poor lil monkey fell on her FACE and chipped a tooth. Luckily, her mom took her to the dentist and they were able to fix it.. Here is a photog of her sad lil face prior to the visit with the dentist.

A sad day

Dear Friend,

Let me start by saying, "Thank you." You have stood with Elizabeth and me throughout this campaign. Your support has sustained us as we have traveled across this country.

Earlier today, I suspended my campaign for the Democratic nomination for the presidency. I made this announcement from where our journey began just over 12 months ago: New Orleans.

I began my presidential campaign in New Orleans to remind the country that all of us -- as citizens and as a government -- have a moral responsibility to each other, and what we do together matters.

Now, it's time for me to step aside so that history can blaze its path. We do not know who will take the final steps to the White House -- but what we do know is that our Democratic Party will make history.

And, along the way, all of you who have been involved in this campaign and this movement for change and this cause, I am asking you to continue speaking out for those who have no voice, just as Elizabeth and I will continue to do. We need you.

Do not turn away from the great struggles before us. Do not give up on the causes that we have fought for. Do not walk away from what's possible, because it's time for all of us -- all of us together -- to make the two Americas one. We need you.

I hope you will take a few moments to listen to the video clip of my speech in New Orleans earlier this afternoon or to read it below.

In the meantime, Elizabeth and my family join me in thanking all of you for your support and for working so hard on my behalf. We are truly blessed to have such friends.

Thank you.

John Edwards
January 30, 2008

Poor lil mo

My little Mochito has a stuffed red monster from IKEA. It is gotten to that nasty phase where it reeks and is all madded.. I went to IKEA to get him a new one. All I could find was a stuffed rat . I thought he would LOVE it.. He played with it ALL Night.. As I got into bed.. this is what I found.. Lil Mo with BIG RED. My lil baby cakes. What kind of mother am I? How could I think I could replace his woobie?

dear reader....

I appreciate your concern.. but the previous entry should not be shown to my doctors as proof that the cocktail I am currently on needs to be shaken and stirred.

Yes, I am on my meds. No, I do not meed more.

It must be blatantly clear that it is a doctored photo.. I was having a lil fun. JEESH.
I don't have the patience nor a bad ass photo shop program that could do a better job.. I needed a little story to get the lady juices flowing... My turbo powered rabbit needs a little help... it isn't a miracle worker!
p.s. It could totally happen, though. I mean one look at me and Mark would be all into my bizness!

Taking the sting out of the story

I wasn't sure how I would address this. I have made it clear in the past that I do, in fact, want to be Nic Cester's girl.. Yet, he continues to ask.. over and over via song....

(actual lyrics from song)
Big black boots,
long brown hair,
she's so sweet
with her get back stare.

Well I could see,
you home with me,
but you were with another man, yea!
I know we,
ain't got much to say,
before I let you get away, yea!
I said, are you gonna be my girl?

This photo will not help the situation. I do admit I got a little drunk--- and I was excited about the prospect of Mark Wilson's (Bassist for Jet) tongue in my mouth.. But, Nic.. this is as far as it went. I am only human.

Happy 42nd dear Husband!

Victor is 42 today.. and I am so kick ass.. My gifts to him were:

1. An Asian porno
2. A book of lesbian erotica
3. a lifelike version of Tara Patrick's vibrating beav..

Enjoy may darling.

Relieved of my duties?

Yesterday, I had the pleasure of babysitting the best baby ever! No, I am not biased.. well, I am her aunt and I could see how I might be expected to think such things..but I am not even exaggerating in the least about this little girl.. LOVE HER!

The day started out pretty well, my sister and I took Jill to the carousel for a few rides on the lion. (She loves the lion) .. Then we made a few stops to pick up a few things.. and then we returned to her home so she could get ready for her big night out with her hubby .. and baby daddy, Frank.
As soon as they left, we had dinner.. and had an ultra fab conversation about Mr Potato Head and the need for loads of salt on a hard boiled egg..We watched Toy Story.. and then I took her off to bed. Everything went picture perfect.. Until, that is, I stepped into the potty to change into my lounge wear, and I didnt hear her cries.."Mimi! Mimi!" This must have freaked her out, because she was in tears when I found her at the door of the bathroom.. which just melted my heart.. So, needless to say .. when my sister and Frank got home (12:30am).. there newly tattooed, highly charged baby was still awake. It might have had something to do with an ill advised late piece of chocolate.. But come one Frank.. That baby means the world to me.. and just because we danced the night away to Engelbert Humberdick and had a little too much chocolate doesn't mean you gotta be mad. Love ya!

Say it ain't so!

Nic, darling. ......

Please don't sell out and go Hollywood!

Now, if the teefers are causing you problems, (pain, etc) by all means, get them fixed..but I do believe you have surpassed "correction" and dare I say you have ventured into the extreme makeover world of Da Vinci Veneers... You are without a doubt the hottest, sexiest, dirtiest lil rock star out there. DON'T CHANGE.. don't turn into one of those cookie cutter pop stars like Justin Timberlake. (ew) I would be devastated...
FYI... I would still want to make white hot love with you, I just wouldn't be happy about it!

The proof!

Exhibit A: Prior to "changes"
Charming Mr Cester with real smile..

Exhibit B:
Teeth seem to be a little too perfect.. No charming gap. No mismatch sized teefers .


Whats next?? Guest appearances on (gulp) American Idol? Doing a duet with Beyonce?

( MENTAL NOTE: Meatier Nic is way hot.. must get up all in his business)

My baby girl is 6!

Being evil....

is not necessarily a bad thing, it is actually kind of charming.. and in my defense, I think I was driven to it. My bitch of a MIL literally watches every move I make. She does this in a lame attempt to find me doing something wrong, so she can report it to Victor. My most recent transgression involved leaving a candle lit when I left the house. The bitch had to come into my house and blow the thing out. Now it wasn't like I left it in the middle of this huge combustible pile of paper or anything, she just was totally put out because she had to stop doing some other pointless activity and blow the thing out. The fact that she watches me irritates the crap out of me. I decided the bitch needed to be taught a lesson. Last Saturday, Victor had to work and I went up to visit Jill... This created the perfect opportunity !!
God love the Glade company the inventor of the flameless candle. I literally peed myself ..laughing.. and thinking of how hard the bitch would try and try to blow the candle out.. I mean I was genuinely excited by the idea I was torturing the old bat.

-here is a small vid of the object of my affection! It looks like a real candle.. It is so fierce!!-

Don't mess with the bull lady, you are bound to get the horns!

GiGi the ham

You gotta know Meaty!

Do you remember Growing Pains? The Sitcom about the Seaver family? Well, one of the many episodes that has stuck in my head over the years was about the older son, Mike. In this particular episode, Mike is so sick he stays in bed all day and misses school. Later on in the afternoon, one of his friends calls him to tell him what he missed that day. He is shocked that life went along without him. In a nut shell, he discovers that he is not the center of everyone's universe.
Hm.
I must admit to you, dear reader, that I struggle with this each and every day. I often wonder how people can live their lives without me. (hello, have you seen me) HAAHAA
Anyways... one reason why you should follow me (like sheep damn it) is because I can find the BEST shows on the TV.
Case in point, Rob and Big. Just today, I was watching a mini-sode of the show On-demand. Seriously, How can people not watch this? or God forbid, not know that it exists? I seriously peed myself .. HYSTERICAL!


Listen here! Take a break.. breathe .. laugh.. Be like moosey and watch this damn show!

Mad props to Meaty!

For you Papa Pony!

I sent Papa Pony this lil vid:




His response :

"I can't believe this, this scum bag lawyer is your knight in shinning armor. I give up"

Well, dear grandfather...How you like them apples???

(actual scan of my absentee ballot! woo hoo E in 08)

Shannon, repeat after me.. "Hi Nic.. YOU'R HOT"

I had a dream.


A dream about watching a Jet performance.. I guess for some reason or another I found out where they were staying.. and when my sister and I went to the hotel.. I stopped Nic to introduce him to my sister, she is all, yeah whatever. I was so pissed. He seemed really put off and walked away.. I was speechless.. Can you imagine??

I am sorry. Nic. I dream about seeing you, talking to you, being with you, loving up on you, humping you .. er.. ugh.. tee hee??